Not Working as a Team...

Sigh..Feeling very sian. Feeling very lousy and perhaps stressed as well. I don't like the situation that I am in now. This is ultra crap. In 4 days time, we will need to complete the stuff and assemble it together with the EE. Real worried whether we can complete it by then or not.

Rushing project to meet deadline is not a formidable task if the entire team is contributing and every team member is taking initiative. This project belongs to everyone in the team. So everyone should be well aware of what needs to be completed and how it can be done. Once your own task is completed, move on to do the other tasks that is critical to complete the project, although that task is not delegated to you! No one can be sitting there, waiting for instructions, waiting for tasks to be delegated to you, waiting for others to update you on the project progress! That cannot be the case! You will slow down the progress and pull down morale of the team! One got to make an effort to be well-informed about the situation, got to be alert to all the happenings even when you are engrossed in completing the task. Cannot expect the rest of the team to keep feeding you with information and telling you what to do!

Sigh... very sadly, I've someone in the team that is like that. I keep thinking, 'is it becuase i did not communicate to her properly, that's why she so lost?', 'am i demanding too much?', 'are we moving too fast for her and i've not done my part in updating her?' etc. Of course, it takes 2 hands to clap. So definitely, there are times whereby it's my fault. But there's also alot of incidences which I don't think I am the cause. Because we're in the same meeting but why is it that I got certain information out of it and she didn't?! Sigh.. To date, she has completed her most urgent task at hand. I wonder if she will know what she should do tomorrow morning and early afternoon. Will she be just happily msn-ing away while tidying up the data in her laptop? I seriously hope that's not the case because there's alot of things to be done. Will she ask? Will she take the initiative to do certain stuff? I hope she doesn't just wait for instructions. It is very tiring on my side. I also don't want to be repeating to her the consequences should we not be able to deliver. I am tired of repeating, emphasizing, threatening and chiding.

Things are not very fair now. I don't remember when is the last time I did my marketing stuff. There's alot of things that I want to learn - about strategy, about leadership, about marketing, etc. But now I am doing more on product development than anything else. Also neglecting many clients in the process. I am worried after this proj, we will find our 'preferred partner' ranking dropped severely with other clients. So when Boss returns, i will have to ask for extra manpower. The company is not going to grow if he is holding back so much. If he does not support the expansion plans, I will not have the confidence to go out and market the company services. I don't want let the clients down, so die die I will get the approval to increase manpower.

For now, I will have to physco myself to put in the utmost effort to give this project a good ending. And one thing for sure, i am never going to let myself be in such a lousy situation again. Never ever. And equally important, I am not going to let anyone else in the company (current or future pple) to be in such a lousy situation ever again. Never! Of course, this will mean that something might happen. Is it still 'might happen' or 'confirm will happen'? Sigh... all i can say for sure, this is a damn crap situation and no one else in this company should undergo it ever again!